The Mother Within

Hello beautiful souls and for those of us in Australia it’s Mother’s Day. It also happens to be my own mother’s birthday. This year will mark 15 years since she left this earthly plane. Like so many of us who have lost a mother, or who have been mothers and have lost a child, Mother’s Day wherever we are in the world can be a challenging day. Similarly for those who long with all their hearts to be a mother but it never happened … it can be a reminder of something profound missing in life.

I wanted to reflect on my mum and her brother for a moment. Their mother died when they we young – my uncle was 3 and my mum was 5 when they were placed in an orphanage in Bridge of Weir in Scotland. They didn’t receive the love and affection of a parent – even though they were “cared for” in the practical sense. In my quest to learn more about my mother’s family, I also discovered her mother’s mum died young too … the ripple effects of the “unmothered” has been significant in our family. So much in the way of core wounding.

As a mother myself, I swore my child would know love – and though I would have one child, instead of the twins I was pregnant with, or the 5 I wished for when I was younger, I love her fiercely. Like all mothers I’ve made mistakes which in turn cause their own ripple effects … and that’s the way it is. Our children have their journeys – and we are human. I realised my mother and her mother probably felt exactly the same. The difference is nowadays, my daughter and I decided together we would break the cycle – we’d do the hard work to heal generations of the Mother Wound. That wound doesn’t just impact women of course, and the tentacles of such core wounding reaches far and wide.

Part of healing that unmothered part of ourselves is to find that mother within. I often think of my mother and the love she did not receive. Had she received the unconditional love that was her birthright – how different her life may have been – and those who came after her.

I found myself working with wool again the other day. I felt called to it in much the same way I hear the voice that tells me to write. It hasn’t taken me long to learn I have to surrender to the process. The Spirit Doll that wants to come through will make itself known. At first, I thought she seemed like a dancer – unbridled and free – and then I felt a warm, loving maternal energy flow through me so my fingers went with it. She is wearing orange for creativity, joy and self-worth – corresponding to the sacral chakra.
Mother & Child are filled with Rose Petals and Moonstone for new beginnings and Jasmine for love, purity and divine connection. I sense she is connected to my Ancient Grandmother that came to me a week or so ago … and I realised here we have a mother and child with an ancient grandmother watching over them. The female line.

They are now on my altar – but I’d like to dedicate this mother and child to my mother in the hope she feels the loving gaze of these mothers as they gaze at their child. I’d like to dedicate this Mother & Child to all of you who question your relationship with your mother, were hurt by your mother – or are comforted by your relationship with your mother. We all have a different story to tell about our mothers and about our roles as a mother. If we can find that place in ourselves to love ourselves unconditionally, we will send that ripple effect back into the Universe and our unmothered mother’s wounding may begin to heal.

Mother & child – New Beginnings is dedicated to all of you today. The message from the Spirit Doll is “You are Loved More than You Know”.